I think I have struggled my whole life with being a perfectionist, now on the surface there isn't really anything wrong with striving to do things to the best of your ability. My motto has been if you don't do it well, then why do it? Well, when taken to the next levels, this goes down inside and I've been telling myself lies all this time too! When I stopped and listened yesterday what I heard was horrifying, and I know so many others hear this record too...."you are never going to ammount to anything, why are you even trying, hey you screwed it up so many times in the past do you really think you are going to do any better this time? and on and on the record plays" (yes this record can be contributed to by the words of others, but I allow it to continue playing) I realized that I didn't even know that I was beating myself up even when I was not doing or trying anything!!! YIKES! So what to do about this?
I've started putting encouraging scriptures and quotes up all over my apartment to rebrainwash myself with truth, love and encouragement! I am human and I am going to make mistakes, lots of them everyday, but that isn't what defines me. I am defined by continuing to get up and try again and by the One who holds my todays and tomorrows, so I am going to keep getting up and trying again everytime I get knocked down (which is often for anyone who knows my story!) and I am going to remind myself of my favorite verse Deuteronomy 31:8 "the Lord himself goes before you and will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged."
I pray that we will each continue to stand up and try again today!
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